Sunday, December 20, 2009

just for today

I am still practicing living in the NOW but this season brings out so many memories of days gone by.  There are constant reminders of when my boys were little in the ornaments made by my mom that grace our Christmas tree and the many crafts she made all over our home. They bring me to a happy place in my heart.  Wayne has been transposing a lifetime of memories when the boys were very little and this tugs at my heart so much it is almost painful.  I want to reach in his monitor and tickle their little toes.  My Dad was sage when he insisted we videotape all these moments.  Helen chimed in with the suggestion that our lives will flash before us like a blink of an eye once we have kids so I took heed on both words of wisdom and stayed in tune to every detail while raising our boys.  I finally completed my blog books entitled "in my words" and I am proud to give them as gifts this week.  All the presents are wrapped and look so pretty and festive.  I plan to continue baking my next round of kolacky cookies for our Christmas Eve dinner with Wayne's family and my friends in Delavan.  I will dabble in trying to make my mom's famous wreath cookies that my boys loved so much as well as the thin mint cookies.  Then we will take a break from all the preparations and be entertained by James Cameron's new flick, Avatar, at Danny's theater.  It is so luxurious at that place and Dan told us the 3D version is the best.  This has been an extremely tumultuous week and despite the fact our hearts remain heavy with grief, I am going to embrace the love that was shared by my family and friends and put whatever I can into my cookies.  I am blessed. xo