Monday, December 14, 2009

benes family

Frank, Marilyn, Kevin, Matthew, Amy and Jillian.  To me this was the ideal family.  Each brother had a brother and sister and each sister had one of each to share their journey as siblings and with the extended family of 17 cousins.  I do not know of another family that was the epitomy of love, togetherness, and old fashioned fun.  They always had a house filled with toys and games and crafts and music.  Marilyn earned her degree in teaching and embraced her gift of nurturing by raising her children and providing a warm, loving home for children who needed care while their families earned a living.  There was no shortage of wee ones in their home.  No matter what time of day I would stop by and she was never too busy to take time and chat.  Frank provided well for his brood and often worked side jobs for friends and family members with his expertise in electrical and home construction.  He could make anything and he knew exactly how to do it.  Upon entering their home one might almost get bowled over with the love that filled the air.  Immediately you felt relaxed and welcome.  Some may say this is the old fashioned family; a rare gem in these busy times.  That's what made it so special.  They opened their home for our sister Karen's wedding celebration and it was the best party we ever attended.  Everyone was laughing and singing and dancing in close quarters but that's what made it so much fun.  People were everywhere, together, sharing the joy of new beginnings.  It was magical.  They make the best host and hostess.  I chose the first picture for it depicts their characters perfectly.  Always making us laugh. 

This picture was taken more recently during our niece's wedding, another fantastic celebration where everyone laughed and sang and danced.  But alas, it would be one of the final memories of a family still living under the tapestry of togetherness.  Our world would get many jolts following this day in the form of illness, death and conflict.  Sadly, this happens to most families, but the vast amount of people affected would damage many lives forever.  We lost our matriarch, Virgie, and not even a year prior to that, our beloved Jim, husband to sister Julie and dad to Jackie, Vickie and Ginny, would leave us for the better place.  Today we mourn another devastating loss, sweet Kevin, a mere 19 years young, was tragically struck and killed on Friday.  True to his giving nature he donated some of his organs so that others may live.  This is a testament to the beautiful boy he was to all who were privileged to be a part of his life. 

Marilyn and Frank should have no regrets for they gave their son a dream family.  Their lives are forever shattered, but their faith will sustain them.  We will always remember their devotion to family and hopefully learn to be more like them.  I know I will.  All the cliches in the world cannot suffice to say how fragile we are.  How short life can be.  Feel our love these next days, Benes family.  You will be surrounded by many forms of comfort and love.  Tragedies such as this have no reason.  They are senseless to us mere mortals.  Perhaps you will not realize it now, but someday you will and it will provide the incentive to keep moving forward, even if through the motions.  Matt, Amy and Jill will keep his memory alive.  Kevin will smile down and you will feel his presence forever.  His love is everlasting.  I pray that all who read this, understand that no one cheats death. The best we could do is see the good in everyone.  We are all connected.  Please tell those you love that you do.   xo